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Keep it real or fake it to make it?

March 3, 2010

More stuff about being beautiful in the Press today. Anita Burge is injecting her sixteen year old daughter with Botox. Simon Cowell says that Botox is as normal as cleaning your teeth.

Are we living in a madhouse? Or not?

Maybe Simon is right. He insists that he is not ‘super’ vain but just a guy who likes to look after himself. And I admit to having Botox on my frown line from time to time. A frown line is such a giveaway that one has “issues”. Ask Dorian Gray. He knows. Oh well alright you can’t, he’s dead. Or rather never existed. But, if you think about it,  he was the grandfather of the whole Botox movement. In a way.

Look, it’s clear that I’m as confused as most people. And I’m not talking about car insurance. I’m talking about body image, again. I might continue to talk about it for some time, hoping for a resolution.

Anita Burge has had 150 cosmetic procedures and she looks very nice to me. But does she look real? On the other hand, does she need to? Are we all just being snobbish about the importance of being real? Should we give up on reality altogether?

Lots of question marks, I beg your pardon. I’ll make some statements instead. It looks more confident. And looks are everything; I think we’ve established that.

Right. That’s a good word to start with. So. Another one. Yes. A third. Shut up. OK. Here are some assertions.

I have fake breasts. They look good and feel good, if you like the feel of fake ones. And I do. I can’t actually remember what real breasts feel like. So I’m fine with mine; I’m perfectly happy, sitting at home feeling my own breasts. How sad is that? But we’re not here to talk about me, she lied.

What I’m trying to say is this: there are people with extreme views on any subject. The Daily Mail seems to take the stance that it’s outrageous for a sixteen year old to be injected with a muscle relaxant to stop her developing wrinkles. Simon Cowell, on the other hand, says that having Botox is as natural as scratching your arse. He didn’t say that at all but I think I can put words into his mouth if I like, as long as I say sorry. Sorry Simon.

Similarly, lots of people celebrate extreme skinniness, proudly showing off bones that most of us never see, while others think it’s a travesty.

And while some people think being real is key; being natural is nice;  others think that fake is fabulous.

I suspect that  most of us flounder, confused, somewhere in the middle: victims – despite all good sense – of a lifetime of indoctrination towards worshipping and aspiring to the “beautiful” bod.

And it’s crazy. There will always be someone younger and more beautiful than us. Unless you’re Angelina Jolie of course. But the rest of us will never be satisfied. I know I’m not. So please, let’s turn our admiration on to real women and put the supervain amongst us out of our misery.

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